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I'm sure you've always wondered what I was looking for It really never was a person persay, I'm not the kind of girl who thinks cheating is a great way to go, but I suppose I was looking for something thought evoking or emotional.

I've been missing you for awhile, even though you've been next to me the whole time. Every psychotic semi schizophrenic episode, every jealous rage, every self hating fear, every unwarrunted paranoia, every complete abandonment, every emotional affair, every disaster blamed upon you, every test of loyalty, every imbalance of power, every hateful thing said, you stuck by me even after I pushed you away time and again.

It seems our friends were secretly pretty jealous of our happiness to begin with. We may have been guilty of flaunting it a bit too much. But suddenly I'm seeing you in the morning and I appreciate you again, but so much more than I ever did before. You're an amazing person. Certainly the distance I've kept you at was to protect my mangled heart. Everything I really have ever wanted is present in your personality.

Strength, passion, courage compassion, pragmatism, acceptance, wisdom and beauty. Content as I am with our situation, looking forward into the future I smile at the possibilties with you as I imagine how much more wonderful our life will be as I stabilize and realize you can handle anything and I am safe and loved. This morning thinking of you I closed my eyes and smiled and felt it rise in my chest. I know you're not the kind of person who likes to talk excessively about feelings, so many deceive and try to use that kind of discussion to manipulate others.

That's slimy and you are so much classier than that type of misfortune. The love you have given has made a happy girl out of me and as we embark on our journey together, to become the mother of your child or children would be my honor and make a happy woman out of me. I just can't say enough how words fall short of expressing how much I love you I'm just going to have to show you Imagine how beautiful that will be and I can see your smile, like the first time I saw you, radiant and on fire, shining brightly as if the sun rays were emanating from behind you.

To see that heat in your eyes and feel your arms around me, it's all I really need. With you by my side, the oceans of despair that once threatened to swallow me are mere puddles that we splash in, unaware of the existence of dreariness on even the grayest of days.

For every time you smiled your award winning grin, and told me it was already a great day because you woke up next to me, I smile now too! You truly taught me the meaning of love the one you're with I'm so thankful you happened into my life the way you did, I wonder if you'll ever know what vital impact and fortifying influence you made, I wonder if you know what a hero you truly are to me? I wonder if you'll ever read this and truly feel how sincere the sentiment.

I smile again just thinking of opening that door and your shining, glowing face smiling at me and I can't wait to kiss those lips tonight when you rest in my arms before we drift away together. Our secret m4w I want to care for you. I sometimes want to hurt you. I sometimes want you to cry. I sometimes want you to feel ashamed.

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I know you're not the kind of person who likes to talk excessively about feelings, so many deceive and try to use that kind of discussion to manipulate others. That's slimy and you are so much classier than that type of misfortune. The love you have given has made a happy girl out of me and as we embark on our journey together, to become the mother of your child or children would be my honor and make a happy woman out of me.

I just can't say enough how words fall short of expressing how much I love you I'm just going to have to show you Imagine how beautiful that will be and I can see your smile, like the first time I saw you, radiant and on fire, shining brightly as if the sun rays were emanating from behind you.

To see that heat in your eyes and feel your arms around me, it's all I really need. With you by my side, the oceans of despair that once threatened to swallow me are mere puddles that we splash in, unaware of the existence of dreariness on even the grayest of days. For every time you smiled your award winning grin, and told me it was already a great day because you woke up next to me, I smile now too!

You truly taught me the meaning of love the one you're with I'm so thankful you happened into my life the way you did, I wonder if you'll ever know what vital impact and fortifying influence you made, I wonder if you know what a hero you truly are to me? I wonder if you'll ever read this and truly feel how sincere the sentiment. I smile again just thinking of opening that door and your shining, glowing face smiling at me and I can't wait to kiss those lips tonight when you rest in my arms before we drift away together.

Our secret m4w I want to care for you. I sometimes want to hurt you. I sometimes want you to cry. I sometimes want you to feel ashamed. I want you to care for me.

I sometimes want you to be scared of me. I don't want anyone to suspect. Just you and me. I am strong, Dominant. You are smaller and weaker. I'm looking for a younger girl, who wants to experience an erotic, full body massage. I was just one of your many dirty little secrets. You think I didn't catch that? Lol It's all good. Will I miss you? You're one of the only people that I've really been able to relate with since I got here.

But, I won't miss "this" You're a good man. It's not your fault you had this affect on me. Honestly, I hope this never happens again. I hope I'm stronger and I keep more of me for myself. That, no man can make me want him so bad. That I throw everything else away. There were times I could only think of you.

I would lay there with him and shut my eyes and pretend it was your hand on my breast, your lips on my neck and your tongue on my clit.. Btw, not that it matters, but, I broke up with him. I never could understand or justify with myself what he did to you. What you said was true. He was way overprotective, and I'm just not into that. Honestly, the way I've been acting is seriously, not normal. Nobody else has a chance until I give you up. The possibility of "you" So, this is me getting you out of my head.

Which may be futile. But, I'm going to try. Got to set a good example you know. I do have my flaws, as does everyone else. Those flaws are what makes us human. Yet, even though I am all of the above, I find myself single. However there is a lot that I have in me to offer. I want the girl that I find to know that she means the world to me.

Hearing from you or seeing you would make my day complete. You would be the first person I think about when I wake up, and the last person I think about before I sleep.

Always be there for her through it all, the good and the bad. Encourage her in all her endeavors; never look down on her because we would be equals. Your happiness would be all that matters to me. I may not be able to give you material things, but I would give you everything I got. I have included a photo of myself; I know everyone has a preference in what they look for. I am real by the way, there is construction on I and Boise State will play Georgia first game of the season this year.

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