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Hugh and I George and the Dragon Whacko! Pop Shows Brief details of other surviving shows. See also Dick and the Duchess. Details of selected later comedy series from the late s onwards So many wonderful comedy gems have been needlessly wiped! Of course, to put it another way, a lot of dud material too, some of which, like Meet the Wife, have irritatingly survived the years. But, oh, to be able to turn back the clock, and remonstrate with the short sighted executives who insisted tapes were wiped.

Let's celebrate briefly three fine situation comedy series that I specially love. Who can forget that memorable opening in the shop window? Name the two stars centre stage. The best of the scripts provided Tony Hancock with a brilliant foil for his comic genius. Yet to assume they are all perfection would be too hopeful- quite often the shows are almost as humdrum as the very best of their contemporaries, however when at the peak of excellence, they are unsurpassable even today.

So where exactly did Hancock's once eagerly anticipated ATV series go wrong? The stories were built around the same old Tony Hancock, he had the same mannerisms, the same slightly bigoted attitudes. Was it the absence of Sid James?

Certainly that was one failing, but more importantly, Hancock is clearly suffering from a lack of confidence. And who can blame him once he had first seen those scripts? Yes the missing ingredient is Galton and Simpson, those ace scriptwriters. Twenty years earlier Laurel and Hardy, the greatest comedy duo had seen their film career collapse, when writers insisted on merely recreating their old gags. And so here, this is sub Hancock, the same Hancock washed up again, but never in quite the right mixture as before, and never with any inventiveness.

A couple of these stories have potential, even if unfulfilled potential, but the others are simply abysmal, marking the sad collapse of the greatest television comedian. Laurel and Hardy did almost revive their careers on stage, but sadly the lad from East Cheam never quite made a good comeback. The picture is from the ATV Hancock series, one of the stories not currently available.

In his Alpine costume, he's stuck in the aisle, unable to get past her. Then he has an altercation with a passenger, Hancock rather unpleasantly standing on the man's legs. He gives us his war memoirs how we drove the plane with his feet etc, all very unsubtle, and pointless too. After the plane has landed the journey to the Alpine hotel.

The fun should really start at the hotel, but it doesn't. The receptionist Richard Wattis greets Tony with an apology, "we only accommodate celebrities The figures on the doors are rickety and 26 turns into 29 booked for a French lady June Whitfield. She is not too impressed that she has to share with Tony, nor is the receptionist impressed with the "intrigue," though Tony doesn't mind sharing.

It's Kenneth Williams, he can't make much of the script either, though he gives it his best shot. The mood does pick up building up to a nice joke about Hancock's photo. Williams is apparently the yodelling champ of East Dulwich, "I've got the biggest yodel in Dulwich. Their third companion spends his time blowing an Alpine horn, Hancock is glad to get out on the ski slope, but after an accident a forlorn Hancock returns to the hotel and a new room.

Another misunderstanding with the French lady and Hancock is placed under arrest. In the last scene he's behind bars, six months solitary, better, he decides, than the hotel To the Hancock Page. Now the prosecution Tony Hancock , cataloguing the marriages of a very bland looking bigamist and "his all too obvious charm. It's another failure for our lad. Prisoner in the cell is Sid.

He's sure Sid must be dead guilty, but Sid explains him how to get him off. In court, the defence produce numerous objections, to no avail, but where are the witnesses who are to testify against Sid? All have mysteriously not turned up. A stand-in policeman Arthur Mullard reads the prosecution case from his notebook with the classic line, "we took him into custard Tony fluffs Sid's surname, but that isn't in the script.

Sid's pathetic story can bring only one outcome. The identity of the guilty man is revealed. Tony explains all in a Dartmoor quarry Hancock Page. All the best people are present. But not for much longer. Proceedings are interrupted by a plane taking off. The whole place rattles to its foundations. The audience disperse not upon the order of their going.

Tony must sell his white elephant home. Will estate agent Sidney James buy it back from him? So why not sell it himself? In dense fog, newlyweds are shown the property, and are they smitten?

They are until a plane takes off, for "the fog's lifted. Sid is selling another house to an aged couple whose last home has fallen over a cliff. It might seem that in those days people bought houses without much care and without drawn out solicitors' searches!

Another musical soiree, Tony on cello. Nearby the new dam is declared open. Tony rows off in the double bass. Tony fluffs one line but makes a nice joke of it. He does even better with a faulty table leg To the Hancock Page. Hancock's Forty Three Minutes This is some sort of variety show. In a real dinner jacket Tony tells us the joys of compering.

So we begin with the showgirls, rather plump, ordered off by Tony, but with their weight, it's hard to push them off. They exit with insults to "fatty.

Then there's a real monkey act, it wouldn't be allowed these days. Next three jugglers led by Tony perform some completely expected poor tricks, followed by a proper juggler who shows how to do it. Tony is back with a large harmonica, except of course he's only miming.

Found out, he does a duet with Max Geldray, not a success, so the great man, Geldray that is, does a solo turn. Arnold's paper tearing leaves Tony speechless. Ditto his spoon act. His "piece de resistance," a dance, similarly finds Tony unimpressed. Indeed it is amateurish. The Keynotes sing Wake Up Little Susie, this is supposed to be for real, though rock n roll it ain't. Gypsy in My Soul follows. John Betjamin refuses to appear, and doesn't.

After a One For All, Tony scolds him, "if you'd turned up for rehearsals Gregson isn't a comic and is too over the top here. Morecambe-like flattery stops him walking off in a huff and we watch a swordfight of sorts, Douglas Fairbanks it is not. White Christmas is the finale To Hancock 's menu. He's worried about his new tv series, Ericson King of the Vikings. We soon see why. At Splendide Film Studios, Sid in charge, the cast are revolting. Takes 1, and 2, and 3 and 4, all very very brief, a puzzled Hancock stops to inspect the one camera, it's a still camera!

Tony demands they use a proper camera, which he offers to pay for. Immediately Sid produces one, "I've been waiting for you to pay for it. But it must be American to capture their market. Tony tries to keep a straight face. After a duff fight with duffer sound effects, on to victory by Ericson. Now to the cutting room, where Sid is inexpertly at work, he also muffs one line.

Tony awaits the finished product in front of his tv screen, "I wonder what sort of mess he's made of it. The opening is a nice parody on Robin Hood. Thereafter it's more akin to the Goons as our heroes step on to a London bus, maybe as well the BBC cut it off, axing the film, in favour of the 84th showing of the London to Brighton train To the Hancock Page.

The Set That Failed Fine observation on the new telly viewing habit, with some interesting references to contemporary programmes.

The Lad faces the possibility of missing "highlight of the week" Dotto at 7. Though to vainly console himself he falls back on that old standby that there's nothing on to miss.

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Is it a put up job? Tony offers to put Stan right on the niceties, a real craftsman he is. Next morning, donning his overalls, Tony explores the ironmongers, annoying the assistant, especially when it's evident he doesn't know the names of many tools, "a great big thing to bash it with. After passing on his new found knowledge of tools, he hammers in some nails, badly. There won't be any mess queries an anxious Stan.

Tony's real task is to erect a new wardrobe in Stan's wife's bedroom, a job Stan isn't confident enough to tackle himself. Before putting it up, there's much time talking, and creating something of a mess, as poor Stan's confidence is gradually eroded, though he politely refrains from comment.

Tony Hancock was never a slapstick comedian, and the sawing of a plank, wrongly measured, is not performed with enough enthusiasm or crassness to make it amusing. No wonder measurements are incorrect if the craftsman uses his arms to measure, then Stan's braces. Then there's Tony's ininextinguishable confidence in his own misplaced ability that never rings true, as Tony finally curses Arthur Fuller and his tv trick photography, and walks out on poor Stan, what a mess he leaves behind.

Next night, he sees the lamplighter again and tonight it's a gardening programme on telly. Tony adds his own commentary To Hancock Menu. The Night Out with Derek Nimmo. No start on a street corner this time, it's the morning after, the left overs of a giant party, Tony slumbering into life to jazzy downbeat music, in a mime sequence, before a waiter enters- he's in a hotel.

Tony can recall little, except he'd gone boozling with Tom. However he perks up when he finds a bird in his bed, "not bad," and this is the Bridal Suite! He tries to awake "Mrs Hancock," though he knows not her first name. After romanticising, Tony's flow is interrupted by Gavin Derek Nimmo who explains that this is Sarah, his, not Tony's, wife. Tony quizzes him over the events of the night. This he reiterates often, and Gavin keeps on assuring him no, "Good" replies Tony, but uneasily.

He commences singing the song again, in cha cha. Tony checks what happened by phone with Tom, but a delirious maid Patsy Smart interrupts, hugging him, calling him her Anton. There's a pathetic story that she cannot stay with him, rather improbable too. We await a punchline, but it never comes. Now a crowd gathers, friends from last evening.

More champers is ordered as Tony fights off Sarah's attentions, mainly to fawn over Gavin, whom he has discovered is gentry. Gradually however the truth dawns on 'Tone,' he's footing the bill. Removing the unconsumed drink, 'Squadron Leader Hancock' complains at reception to the clerk Donald Hewlett. A whip round, Tony proposes to his guests, but all too expectedly they vanish into the dawn. Tony, attempting to bunk also, is prevented by porters, and so has to flee via the upstairs window.

Along a ledge, and into another room to another guest who is inebriated. Tony relates his sad tale and sings that song, and drinks more drink. The pair pick up another crowd and Tony is last seen booking into another hotel, "put it all down to me," he smiles.

No, the punchline never came to that oft repeated question. The story is as flat as that leftover champagne To the Hancock Menu. The Writer The tale of Tony's efforts as a poor tv scriptwriter, with too obvious parallels with this series' own abysmal scripts.

This one by Terry Nation only goes to prove his writing talents lay not in the 'comedy' field. This starts in an empty bar where Tony waits restlessly to be served. Having destroyed a bell, he moves to the adjoining bar, where a tv comic Jerry Spring - sic - John Junkin is getting ready to watch himself on tv. His scriptwriter Elmo Francis Matthews is at his side.

After returning his broken empties, Tony purchases an Italian wine, Chateau Latour, as well as a small brown ale. After enthusing on English country life, he debunks this pub where anything and everything is banned. Tony watches the comedy on tv, introduced by Pete Murray. Soon Tony is decrying "Britain's leading funnyman," to Jerry's discomfort. By now Jerry is getting quite worked up, until Tony spots who he is. Imparting his advice, Tony explains Jerry should include some funny walks in his act.

Jerry laps it up, though naturally Elmo is not amused. Jerry however sees something in Tony, maybe he was desperate? Into the script conference walks a new Tony, dark glasses, loud suit. Dressed over the top, Tony plays it over the top because the script is so dull. Listening to a taped conversation is plain tedious, this interspersed with numerous "can we please get on," but we never do.

Finally Tony spits out a concrete idea Certainly impracticable, and Elmo is right to storm out. Maybe the others ought to have taken his lead. Now Tony is on his own, composing a script, performing his Noel Coward impersonation. His typing skills are less good, and thinking up a single joke is even more problematic. This really is becoming like this real life series. After a long frustrating lack of inspiration, Tony resorts to Christmas crackers to obtain his material.

As he reads over Tony's script, Jerry's eager smile turns to blankness. At last one laugh. But it's only about "the way you spell trousers. An attempt to read through the script, Tony in the part of Blodwen to Jerry's Dai quickly dies the death and the script veers back to a sample of awful jokes, then impression of Marlon Brando, somewhere along the line Jerry sneaks out. Then there was one. Yes, that was a parable for Hancock. Maybe rather clever if you look on it as intentionally introspective, but surely not!

Tony returns to the pub to watch wrestling on tv. The viewer, the wrestler himself of course, takes excception to Tony's remarks and floors Tony, who never gets up. He never did get up Amen. Click for more details: Lunch Box review of the only surviving show, plus details of some of the series. Celebrity Spot - length: The Morecambe and Wise Show Oct 1st Ernie is brilliantly unintelligible in a changing of the guard scene. Then he points out Eric is going bald, leading to "a million" bald jokes.

He recommends a toupee. However Millicent Martin spots the difference. Jimmie Rodgers sings Lonesome Road. Eric and Ernie are two birds, Eric waiting for eggs to hatch has "hatcher's cramp. Freddie demonstrates to the boys his 'jumping bit' before singing. With Sid and Dick, a game of pretend table tennis, Eric joins in, "you're not playing a mug. Jimmie Rodges sings I'll Say Goodbye before everyone joins in for a camp fire sing song.

Eric messes it all up so is not allowed to sing. Instead he stokes up the fire, and the whole set is smoked out. He shows Ernie an example of his art, taken through a keyhole, "my wife has a negligee like that. In a beard, Eric presents a French play, with a lady in a fur coat, but nothing underneath.

Eric of course wants to rip it off, "not yet," is the oft repeated line. This is one of their classic sketches. Eric and Ernie's dancing partner has left them, so they have to perform their routine without her. The sketch with their imaginary dancer becomes overlong. In pigtails, Millicent Martin sings The Day The Circus Left Town, with dancers weirdly dressed as animals, then clowns, quite surreal, Dali eat your heart out, then they are acrobats, certainly imaginative.

Eric is given the part of the depressed Norman, you really need to know the series to enjoy the sketch. Rodney and Constance keep bursting into tears, not to mention depression that sweeps o'er Sid and Dick in hysterics, and though this is obvious there's a fine finish.

The opening show in September starring Gracie Fields and Guy Mitchell was seen in a mere , homes. In the first quarter of the highest total of viewers for the show in one week was 11,, Then by February , with the main ITV areas operational, the show reached five million homes for the first time.

A November show saw that figure rise to 7,, The th show in April eclipsed that with a figure of 7,, homes. At that stage of the programmes had featured in the national Top Ten. Lew Grade pulled the show in , had costs spiralled too much? In it was briefly revived, without credit to Parnell, but lasted only one season.

The climate of variety had changed too much. First show, top of bill are Pete and Dud October 3rd Special Guest Roy Orbison colour Autumn Larry Grayson January 6th with Englebert Humperdink. March 24th hosted by Ted Rogers. April 14th with Sacha Distel. December 1st Ten minutes of this show were captured on film. It's enough to show the stunning size of the Palladium stage.

After the opening extravaganza with dancers on several levels, on come the Kaye Sisters. Then Max Bygraves arrives on stage in a bubble car. April 13th The Tiller Girls start the entertainment with a peerless synchronised dance routine.

Enter, stage right, a beaming Tommy Trinder who stoops to pick up some litter, but no, it's one of Liberace's cast-offs. He has some topical jokes, including a complaint that there are "too many medical shows" on telly, and fantasises on what might happen if the BMA run the tv, shows like Sunday Night at the Clinic.

Dick Shawn, first time on British television, has an interminably long routine, interminably unfunny too. He's a teacher, and gives Tommy a well rehearsed and delivered reply to the query, "What do you teach? He is slightly nervous in his patter but gets a lorra laughs with huge slides of Liverpudlians as babies. Celebrities in the audience include Sylvia Sims, a footballer and two boxers. Arthur Haynes with Leslie Noyes stroll on stage complaining that they haven't been chosen to be on the bill as they do not "come from Liverpool," a phrase LN echoes repeatedly.

Mrs Haynes in the shape of Rita Webb comes on stage to er, sing, "what have you got to compare with that in Liverpool? Kenneth More enjoys a minute with JT before introducing Pete Seeger who gives us two songs, one with a very boring story. After a nondescript dance with men in suits and diaphanous girls, here comes Frankie Howerd. He's "in a quandry," though also his confiding best, unsure what jokes to tell after Val Parnell had phoned him, "he riles easily.

It's nearly flagging, but he keeps us laughing with a song accompanied by "a funny woman," With These Hands, "nobody goes to sleep while I'm on" Palladium menu. April 10th The Tiller girls dance with four men in wheelchairs, then Bruce joins in, entering in pyjamas and a false nose. After which he talks openly and jokingly of course about his recent nose operation. Three French acrobats are followed by an odd toast from Bruce to The Ladies, a reference in particular to some golfing friends he's to join after the show.

Finally his new single Clementine. The final section of the show has the cast of The Most Happy Feller. As there's a minute to spare, Brucie, even though he must have been dying to get away to see his golfing ladies, joins in a final chorus To ATV Variety , or to Palladium menu. I was expecting Bruce to come on stage through the egg! But no, he enters conventionally, with talk of his holiday in the south of France. The Dior Dancers give us an avant garde crime dance.

The "adorable" Beryl Reid has gone oriental, she tells "Bluce. She finishes with a duet with Bruce. Rise Stevens sings in Italian, not a very tuneful choice, not ideal for this show. But her next is more melodious, One Night of Love, and it's in English too. Beat the Clock has a returning couple from Cambridge. After which a couple from West Wickham never even have time to play their game. Bruce returns with an Adam Faith hairstyle and jacket, "I'm all ready then.

Just as well, Bruce says they're both booked for summer shows in Blackpool To Palladium menu. December 3rd - transmitted during the Equity strike. A tour de force, clearly well scripted, but was the famous decorating scene partly improvisation? Enter Norman Wisdom with a song announcing he's in charge tonight.

In protest the band leader exits, leaving Norman free to conduct. Bruce Forsyth comes on and sings and chases said conductor round the audience. Norman's attempt to tell a gag without laughing, is typical, but not him at his very best. It's impossible, he just has to laugh, and their timing is immaculate. Strip Joker they should have called it, and even Bruce can't help laughing.

The first stage scene is set to Morning by Grieg. It leads into Norman singing Me and My Imagination, and a mimed dance with invisible partners. Then the famous decorators scene, no dialogue until the end, simple effective slapstick, Norman the butt of the mess.

Beat the Clock sees Norman interrupt proceedings, it all looks a little sparse with no hostess! Norman the singer sketch, interrupted by a phone call for Bruce, the old music hall gag as Norman obeys Bruce's instructions, but it's not overdone as Bruce chats to his darling.

Norman plays three instruments, sings Wearyin for You and plays three more instruments, the last one accompanied by Brice on the accordion. Finally number seven, percussion. Then he sings his theme song, not my favourite.

There are still a couple of minutes, Bruce tells Norman. For a second he looks at Bruce, they both must have been pretty exhausted. So there's time to dance a duet, the polka and other dances. The final music, no revolving stage, except the base as the pair twirl into the curtains. Thank goodness someone thought to preserve this one! December 10th Sadly only part one has been preserved in non standard form. It includes some pre show scenes which the Network dvd rather sadly describes as by a "warm-up man.

Bruce enters prostrate on the revolving stage, exhausted after the previous Sunday's show with Norman Wisdom. But he's up for singing Getting to Know You and gets to know some of his audience in the way only Brucie can, some nice reactions proving he's the master of the impromptu interview. He has some enjoyable reminiscing with Ray Ellington, as they pick out members of Jack Parnell's Orchestra, then they sing together a jazzed up version of The Three Bears.

Time for a tap dance with his then wife Penny. Nothing if not an old fashioned song and dance act, but very charmingly put over To Palladium.

JT's impressions of Hancock etc fall flat and the gags are weak too. The pair have a better topical song, O Mr Tarbuck, then dance, proving that Sid was never one dimensional. JT talks about Cassius Clay's recent bout, and about the Christmas lights. Famous names in the audience include Ralph Reader. A lively dance opens part three. Des O'Connor, standup comedian, gives his thoughts on Women, perhaps the best part of his act is his cheeky laugh. It certainly ain't Women's Lib. Tony Martin is the ageing top of the bill.

Finally People Need People Palladium. Sunday Night at the London Palladium - 22nd March After the usual opening with The Tiller Girls, Bruce Forsyth enters, still drooling over the previous week's guest Ethel Merman- only a pity that that show isn't preserved! BF performs some lively numbers in her honour and naughtily speculates where Ethel might have hidden her mike.

Then he introduces The Trapinos, comedy acrobats, after which he apologises for calling them "The Traponis.

In Beat the Clock, BF is assisted by Sally and has contestants from Goodmayes where's that near asks the compere politely , and Worcester. The final part is graced by an attractive "old street cloth" of London as Billy Russell William Cassius Russell he calls hisself performs an updated version of his classic On Behalf of the Working Classes, "five minutes," he confides to us, "then the axe drops. Top of the bill is the awfully lively, but to me uninspiring, Spanish dancer Antonio, with Rosario.

Fifteen minutes too long To Palladium. New Palladium Show September 26th First of the revamped series, introduced still by the 'Startime' theme. And now hosted by Jimmy Tarbuck, who had made his name on the old Palladium show back in October He bounces on, through a brick wall, singing, then describing his send off from Liverpool as he set off for his new job.

He also talks about the greats on previous Palladium shows, with occasional interruptions in the orchestra pit from "Hack" Jack Parnell. First guests are Peter Paul and Mary who give us three numbers, ending with the tale of Samson.

Then the new feature, the unannounced special guest, here Sarah Miles, a little gauche, trying to plug her latest picture.

JT ushers her along. She then introduces a trio of guests: After another dance, JT pans round the audience for interesting people. October 24th Michael Bentine starts the show as The Great Sebastian, in a sketch clearly held over from the previous week.

Then the dancers perform a bouncy medley of Roaring Twenties numbers. Enter JT on a toy car, the latest mechanical wonder from Japan. He introduces Eleanor Toner who renders Danny Boy. That's followed by The Fortunes with their latest hit. Topo Gigio, if you like him, is on stage, JT has an intimate chat, trying his best. The show concludes with comedian Frank Berry, then The Bachelors. After the pitched battle, out from his auto steps George Raft. Why are you over here, asks JT.

Both muff a line. JT gives a few easy gangster impressions. Raft tells us that he introduced the bolero into Britain in at the Florida Club, and he proves he can still do it, albeit more slowly, pretty well done. JT speculates on future honours for showbiz stars. David Nixon tales a tale of two ropes. Then a long card trick. Hugh Lambert and the Palladium Dancers give us a dance, simple and effectively choreographed.

In between he mumbles something. He dances off at the end. Spike Milligan tops the bill. He'd made two appearances earlier on. Now he has a limerick, a song and joke about Laura, then a folk song, "they all sound the same.

November 21st JT enters to the background of a wall with graffiti including 'Tarby's back. He starts the first part of the show carrying this crown, allegedly it was left behind after the Royal Variety Performance! JT has some topical gags about the gales, and ad libs about the fun had during the ad break, having to quickly move the Parnell band down to the pits.

Then he introduces Robert Harbin illusionist though he calls him "Robin". To finish there's a medley of Cliff's four golden discs To Palladium.

March 20th in colour Jimmy Tarbuck opens with a brief rendition of Pretty Woman, a foretaste of what's to come later. It's "Mum's Day," he tells us. Then he sings and dances A Dedicated Follower of Fashion, a lively colourful number. After The Biasinis, a couple of trick cyclists, JT talks dully about his golf and then introduces Julie Rogers who sings two numbers, including My Room.

Sylvan is a "card manipulator" who performs various amazing tricks. Then JT delves into the Tarby archive with childhood memories, or is that childish?

The final part opens with Celebrity Time, including Erika Remberg who is to be "the leading lady in the new Saint series" poetic licence there , plus a Parisian fashion designer.

Bob Monkhouse is the first act, "nobody cares about nostalgia," he gripes. So he does his up to date pop star routine. Tom Jones sings two numbers during the show, after which Kate thanks him admiringly, "you've got a beat. Morecambe and Wise top the bill, also singing with Millicent Martin in their own inimitable way Moonlight Becomes You.

Perhaps Mr Monkhouse was wrong, for this show was just full of olde tyme songs! Judy and Liza at the Palladium transmitted Sunday December 20th recorded Nov 15th It's slightly difficult to judge the performance, since the programme was edited from a longer show.

But it does commence with wild applause and goes straight into songs, no introduction at all. Judy sings Once in a Lifetime, and Just in Time, becoming more animated as this second song progresses.

She introduces Liza who has a fine Gipsy in my Soul. Judy and Liza then perform a medley, not the most attractive versions of some of the numbers. The audience shout some requests, you can guess what, before Judy sings from Funny Face.

Judy sits on the stage floor, watching Liza with the poweful Who's Sorry Now. After more requests Judy admits, "I can't learn any new ones," and sings San Francisco, now much more fresh with her appreciative audience. Then at last, Over the Rainbow, she spends a lot of the time cajoling them to join in.

Then enter Larry Grayson with his bicycle dressed as an onion seller. He sings a sultry song with his usual nice self parody. Then less happily, host Jim Dale comes on to imitate the mime art of the great Marcel, the best that can be said is that he's an acquired taste, JD that is. Paul Anka starts his act with Flashback, a tuneless piece of morbidity, then gives us his pleasing rendition of his own song My Way, with some fine camerawork to match the song.

Finally a medley, starting off inevitably with Diana. The games are tediously uninspiring, tying huge knots, then passing groceries while cooped up in a large bag. Finally cymbals burst big balloons. After a song from Jim, there's a clever clever tap dance that looks twenty years behind the times, except for the novel use of the invisible backdrop.

The top star Larry returns, with his usual asides to Jack Parnell, such as "I've got the worms. January 6th This show never got transmitted On the Network dvd is a composite that includes a recording of a Cliff Richard performance, he dressed in white and green. What seems to be from the programme that should have been shown is Jim Dale with a topical reference to why the show wasn't put out. He reads a viewer's poem, awful, including a reference to Ted Heath, then he appeals for much such poems, surely not.

Bob Monkhouse follows with a 'sermon,' including reference to the national crisis. He does a take off of Jess Yates, with wig. Then his own up to date version of Deck of Cards, jokes aimed at contemporary artists like Jimmy Tarbuck and Des O'Connor and lots of others. The star is Englebert Humperdink, eight years on from his first Palladium performance. Ted Rogers with a photo of Larry Grayson borrows too many of his gags. Some up to date satire on London's Third Airport, a sit-in at Essex University, plus other feeble quips.

Allan Stewart gives us two outdated songs, plus oddly some impersonations, slightly excruciating. My kindest comment is that he has a fine individual voice. The New Dolly's thus in the screen credits provide us with more traditional dancing. Better are their cycling acrobatics, distinctly different.

Ted reminds us with some gags that it's Mothers Day. Then Clodagh Rogers sings three lively numbers, two oldies plus her latest, Get Together. Second Generation again, some jaunty ragtime which could be to your taste. Top of the Bill are Mike and Bernie Winters. They look a trifle weary, perhaps explained that this is just a stop-off from Belfast en route to Germany. They joke about the management, that "they've gone to no expense," and give us some corny holiday jokes, here's a sample: April 14th 14th April - last of the series A lively modern dance by the Second Generation for starters.

Ted Rogers' introductory jokes are about Easter, the recent wild Celtic v Athletico Madrid match, about rising pterol prices 56p a gallon! To start part two Ted hands Jack Parnell a disc celebrating the sale of his ,th record. Then Nino a juggler gets good rounds of applause. Ted gives some weak feminist jokes, "I should be that funny. The Second Generation perform a gospel song with a dance that doesn't fit at all, despite the clever visual effects.

Sacha Distel, not a raindrop in sight, is top of the bill. He gives us three typical songs, including naturally his latest single. In between, Ted comes on, complimenting him on his great smile. Sacha asks to be taught how to tell jokes, I'm not sure if this is a great success, despite a good punchline To the Palladium menu. From to , they included Saturday Spectacular, and a mid week variety show normally named Spectacular or Startime.

Sometimes these had casts unannounced in TV Times, making research difficult. Reviews of some surviving shows: Val Parnell's Spectacular Saturday October 1st 7. The opening is a dance among huge organ pipes, vaguely churchy.

Then Ernie introduces Eric who explains he had been pumping the organ. He then prepares for the first guest, Ronnie Brody brings on the prop, but is sent off, for it is not time for the big star yet. They look a throwback to at least ten years previously. Jack Parnell is on drums for another dance. Ernie thinks Eric could be "a teenage rave" if he dresses the part.

This is a prelude to Emile Ford who sings the plaintive Scarlet Ribbons. Then the more lively Them There Eyes. Tiptoe Through The Tulips is another dance routine, harking back 30 years. Then Eric turns up wearing Emile Ford's costume, more could have been made of this. Then with a few insults, Max Jaffa comes on, playing his violin in an even more dated number. After this, it's the cue for Eric with his own violin before Patrice Munsel sings, firstly an opera number, then That Old Black Magic, a little too tunelessly.

Early Call is a Ballet for Television- well it is different, a mime of workers getting up early only to find it's Sunday. Finally it's time for the star, but, oh dear, they have forgotten his name.

Perhaps not one of director Francis Essex's most spectacular efforts. You can see why contemporary critics panned a lot of these variety shows To Spectacular Menu. Rashly he invites a gentleman in the audience to assist him- AH! Ken Morris plays the honky tonk as two girls pull his piano across the stage. That's followed by his accompanying a dance mime in silhouette. AH asks the value of jewels in NP's shop, with an expected payoff.

As the pair share a drink and swap photos, AH happily continues his criminal activity. In the second big sketch, in thick snow, AH puts up at a lonely hotel. NP turns up but there is not room, so AH kindly offers him his room- at four times the price.

They fight over bedspace and AH is expectedly irritating and NP explodes as usual. Note- entertaining is one technician who gets in camera view accidentally. Later a hand grabs away the bedside lamp, in such a hurry preparing for the finale. This is a dance with the whole cast, except AH who is watching back in the audience Spectacular Menu. Lionel Blair and Joyce sing and dance appealingly Just in Time. The French version is the best sketch of the show, but that's not saying much for Jimmy Grafton and Alan Fell dream up an awful script unworthy of the stars, who struggle to get more than a titter.

Diana sings Imagination by the fireside some nice sets in this Albert Locke production , before the most interesting sketch from our viewpoint of today.

Unfortunately Alan Wheatley can't sing at all well at the start, though he improves. The Guy Mitchell Show Sat Feb 27th There's a pleasant cabaret setting, but also evidence that Mitchell was underrehearsed and that he is no comedian. He opens with Bye Bye Blackbird then there is a long section with child prodigy violinist 14 year old Florica Remetier, who plays pieces by Kreisler, a Romanian tune and her own composition.

Ventriloquist Dennis Spicer as a dummy is clever, revealing at the end "Oswald was no dummy. Janet Ball and two partners dance to Let's Face the Music.

Alma starts by singing with the credits on slides behind her. Adam Faith takes up the tune, then the other guests, emerging from large parcels on stage. Alma sings a jazzy Night and Day, Jack Parnell's arrangement a little too obtrusive, as in one later number.

The inevitable Teddy and Pearl appear, "the greatest singing act in the business," according to Alma. There are three songs with them. Bill Finch is a dancing juggler, not that impressive, but there is one section in the dark with his twinkling lighted stick that is visually appealing.

Magician Don Alan clearly impresses Alma with his trickery. Alma sings a loud version of Begin the Beguine. Then she sings an intro for twenty year old Adam Faith. Then his latest record, Lonely Pup.

The couple then sit on a large globe, they explain they have changed the song so it is an irrelevant prop! The new song is I Remember it Well.

Alma sings and dances with them, it's mainly that standard Cheek to Cheek. Then Alma and he sing There Once was a Man. To finish, the stars return for a final bow. Freddie Frinton drifts in and out aimlessly between sketches, I suppose this is why there is a credit to Johnny Speight as scriptwriter, though Frinton's script of a tottering drunk writes itself, the rest could only have taken half an hour to compose. Freddie declares to Alma, "I hope I haven't been too much of a nuisance," perhaps he should have been ejected, he's given little enough chance to develop his routine To Spectacular Menu.

Stan Stennett interrupts before Anne Shelton sings. The three of them give a daft Spanish comedy number. After flirting with Jo Shelton she sings then Hughie Green chats her up. Lonnie sings out part one and sings in part two with some whistling. He reminisces and jokes with Hughie and they sing and dance with Jo. Lonnie sings a couple of numbers and then The World Outside.

The Dallas Boys then perform. Lonnie ends with Gamblin' Man Series 2: Jan 11th , last of a group of three shows. Lonnie with Chris Barber's Band. Lonnie sings 'Hard Travellin' and 'John Hardy' etc as well as one number in which the mike gives out! The scripts partly written by Trevor Peacock were dire, Lonnie would surely have been better advised to stick to what he was brilliant at.

Lynn Cornell sings As Long As. An unfunny sketch with LD as a zoo keeper with Monica the Elephant who is apparently sitting on some woman. Des O'Connor Show Des reads us some viewers' letters, alleged letters. He seeks advice how to improve his image with the teenagers, sings a duet Make Your Own Kind of Music and finally dances the Funky Chicken. Mireille Mathieu sings, then there's A Tale from the Forum: As Des aptly comments, "what a load of rubbish this is.

Des sings Loneliness, and Mireille joins in, with pleasing effect. Phyllis becomes a sex symbol, or is she, according to Des, Bugs Bunny? She has a jealous husband, bringing on a mini-farce that mostly falls flat until a good final punchline. Des sings With These Hands. Lonnie Donegan joins him to give Des some advice on his forthcoming trip to America. They sing the lively After Taxes. Johnnie Ray Sings Four shows that were made in Britain at the end of the 's.

The Big Show US title: Showtime ATV attempted to make a variety show that appealed to both sides of the Atlantic, but somewhere in mid-Atlantic the show sunk. Amongst the dross, search for a few minor gems. Give us back The London Palladium Show. T-T threads his way through the chorus line to introduce Tanya the elephant via a rather weak story, "I wish I hadn't said that.

She's pretty far gone as she sings Sweet Mamma. Lunch Box This popular Midlands series started in Though it was rehearsed, it had the appearance of an impromptu performance, not amateurish but almost like the sort of show anyone could knock up.

It was surely the personality of Noele Gordon that kept it going so long, a real trouper. The opening theme was 'For a Happy. My review of apparently the only surviving Lunch Box Wednesday February 12th A cancan with three dancers, a tour de force of mediocrity in the cramped studio space. She tells us they'd only got to bed at 4. The boys weren't back until 5! NG reveals this show is being telerecorded.

But then this wasn't the best show to choose, in view of NG's earlier remarks. Lunch Box clock shows After Shopping List there's Memory Lane: Why Do I Love You? The clock shows 1. NG discreetly apologises, "well, they were very late you know last night. Some repartee suggests time needs filling out. JA Trio play Airmail Special. NG comes over to thank them, the boys can now have a lie down until their next work, on the Carrol Levis Show tonight at 10pm. Music by the Jerry Allen Trio. You'd be right in saying that this series, built around Noele, started life as the Wednesday afternoon series The starting time varied slightly, but this series ran until January September saw the launch of Lunch Box, David Main produced some shows.

David Galbraith became a regular, starting in December It was around Christmas that Noele began hosting the programmes on Tuesdays to Thursdays, who was in charge at the start and end of the week was not stated. But when 'Teatime' was stopped at the end of January , Noele was able to be hostess on Lunch Box every day, with the length of the show reduced from This arrangement didn't last long, though the show did return to the London area at the start of for some months.

McTweedle, "he never smiles, never says a word," appeared in April and became a regular on the show for a time. Special guest for the whole week began to be announced in the spring. One of the first was to become a familiar face on the show, Eula Parker who was contracted to appear every other week April 8th to 12th , then May 27th week etc etc. An ATV spokesman stated, "Eula produced the largest audience reaction we have had for any singer on this programme.

Letters, telephone calls and viewing figures all pointed to her popularity. She was clearly the most successful singer, so we invited her to sign on. Doreen Orme March 25th week: Lynn Cristie April 15th week: Julie Dey April 22nd week: Annette Klooger April 29th week: Sheila Buxton May 20th week: Joyce Clark June 17th week: Teresa Waters th edition Thursday June 27th July 1st week: Terry Burton July 15th week: Sheila Buxton July 29th week: Julie Dawn Aug 12th week: Diana Coupland Sept 2nd week: Anita Louise Sept 9th week: Patti Lewis Oct 7th week: Joyce Clark Oct 21st week: Leoni Page Dec 2nd week: Diana Coupland Christmas Week Sheila Buxton and Terry Burton Of course regulars needed holiday, and Jack Barton was temporarily the producer at the end of July and during early August.

He also hosted on Oct 23rd to 25th. Jan 6th week: Joyce Clark Jan 13th week: Joan Small Jan 20th week: Joyce Shock Jan 27th week: Diana Coupland Feb 3rd week: Terry Burton The starting time was now Joyce Clarke Mar 3rd week: Terry Burton Mar 10th week: Eula Parker and others including in Apr 21st week, Aug 11th week, Sept 15th week, Oct 20th week, Nov 17th week, Dec 15th week, 22nd week May 12th week: Joan Small July 7th week: Diana Coupland Aug 18th week: Pat Marian her debut on the show Sept 1st week: Joyce Clark Sept 22nd week: Terry Burton Sept 29th week: Joan Small Oct 13th week: Tricia Payne previously known as Pat Marian Among the changes to the regulars: Jean Morton often hosted each Monday during February to May Roy Edwards replaced David Galbraith in summer as a vocalist.

Monday April 28th show was from Stourport School Worcester. The lunchtime News from ITN was included from this summer. In the autumn, the length of the programme was reduced to 40 minutes Wednesday September 17th was a special show, the rd performance of Lunch Box!

It was also the show's second anniversary. Christmas Day, and renamed Christmas Box, the show ran for 75 minutes and had a pantomime flavour. The MacTweedles were also on hand. For , the News now preceded the show, which began at 1.

Some Thursday editions included Bongo with Noele Gordon, a musical quiz on the lines of Take Your Pick- normally five contestants per show. When she invited viewers to send in an answer, 40, people replied. Noelle had a break when Jean Morton hosted the show for the week commencing June 8th. For the first time, the show went on the road on Wed July 22nd , to meet Wolverhampton viewers at Goodyear Park. The format returned to that of late during July, starting Jack Barton produced a few of the shows and was the regular producer by the end of that year.

He introduced the concept of 'themed' shows, for example the shows in the last full week of November were based on Fleet Street. By Christmas the end time was 1. In , the show continued Tuesdays to Fridays, It was seen in the Midlands area only. Noele Gordon was ill at the start of Feb , and Jean Morton took over the hostess role in her absence. A landmark came on Tuesday September 20th, with the 1, programme. One special was on December 23rd when for the first time, the audience was of housebound pensioners: Margaret French, an administrator on the show, said it was " a nice Christmas present for folk who rarely get a chance of going out.

Eula Parker was back in the week before Christmas, finish time back to 1. One special show was on the day of the Royal Wedding, June 8th , which ran from The first ever Mum in a Million competition was held, viewers invited to nominate candidates. The winner was Mrs Adeline Hickson of Leicester.

Though Jack Barton was still producer, Bryan Izzard is credited with directing some of the shows. But producer was now John Pullen, Bryan Izzard was director for the first couple of months.

Ray Merrell and Eve Adams, March 6th week: Monty Babson and Lisa Page, June 12th week: Peter Elliott and Eula Parker, July 17th week: Steve Arlen and June Marlow, Sept 4th week: Andy Cole and Maureen Evans. Another special was Debut- a talent spot, later this was rechristened Encore- the return of those who had made their debuts.

Another 'special' was on Friday July 20th , when the broadcast came from the Trentham Gardens swimming pool in Staffordshire. Midlands girls competed for the amazing title Miss Lunch Box , with the winner promised by John Pullen, appearances "in all our outside broadcasts for the next twelve months. End time was now 1. In , that lost minute was recovered, end time now once again 1.

However on Fridays there was a bonus, the ending was 1. This generosity lasted until the autumn when Fridays fell into the 1. The same faces up front.

In the autumn Brian Bell was new director. Special weekly guests included: Special weekly events included the continuation of Pick a Pop: A new feature on Fridays was Open House- a singsong. One special programme was on Friday June 29th , from Trentham Gardens Ballroom, the highlight being the crowning of the second Mum in a Million.

On Christmas Day there was the usual Christmas Box from 1. It proved to be the last festive show for the Lunch Box team. In , lunchtime shows were old hat and the series ended. Ironically it was replaced temporarily by a teatime show, where it had all begun, Hi-T!

John Pullen was again the producer, Brian Bell director. It was screened Mondays to Fridays from 4. Guests appeared on a daily basis, including some old faces: Doug Arthur later began hosting it only on Mondays and Friday.

But of course it all came to an end when Noele with producer Reg Watson went on to star in Crossroads starting Nov 2nd ! One viewer summed up what Lunch Box meant to so many: Everyone is made to feel part of the programme thanks to our wonderful hostess, I've yet to see a programme which shines with so much friendship and sincerity.

The answer seems lost in the mists of time, but there must have been nearly 1,, of which sadly only the one reviewed here survives To Lunch Box start. Nightclub '68 One of the many regional tv stations' beauty competitions.

This Tyne Tees Television programme is the final programme in the series aimed at finding Miss North East Television, recorded at the Club Fiesta Stockton on September 15th and transmitted four days later. Norman Vaughan, who offers some jokes, some fall flat. Eleven local girls parade, second time round answering Norman's bland questions. And the winner was I won't spoil it top of page. Lionel Blair was a regular with his imaginative dance routines. It ran until Here are details of some of the shows, a lot of which were not seen all round the country.

In this section, I have also included some spin-off shows. The Algerian government says that out of were freed, and some sources say that 30 or more hostages were killed. The British government offered the Algerians manpower, equipment, and expert assistance to expedite the resolution of the crisis, but was refused. American, British, and French nationals are thought to be among the dead. In other news, the latest figures from Angola indicate that at least , Chinese nationals have migrated to the country.

The Angolan government says that work permits were issued for the Chinese to assist with development projects. To see the headlines and the articles, open the full news post. Thanks to Andy Bostom, C.

Commenters are advised to leave their comments at this post rather than with the news articles so that they are more easily accessible. Gates of Vienna cannot vouch for the authenticity or accuracy of the contents of any individual item posted here. We check each entry to make sure it is relatively interesting, not patently offensive, and at least superficially plausible. Further research and verification are left to the reader.

Vienna is the most fully enriched location, and seems to be in roughly the same situation as Oslo. Many thanks to Hermes for the translation from Unzensuriert. The number of pupils with a first language other than German has doubled from to The doubling in the number of multilingual students is evident in virtually all provinces in Austria. The Styrian province is the only outlier, where the number of children with a different native language has tripled from about 5, to 16, The nationwide statistics conceals the dramatic developments in Vienna, because German is hardly spoken in the primary schools of the federal capital.

For a complete listing of previous enrichment news, see The Cultural Enrichment Archives. Scroll down for other posts that have appeared since Wednesday. Certain posts at Gates of Vienna, among them those by Takuan Seiyo, tend to attract the attention and comments of people who are preoccupied with the Jews.

I generally delete such comments without publishing them. Before I deleted it, I sent it to Takuan, just to show him what was coming in. He suggested that I go ahead and post it, followed by his response. Some interesting points, a lot of waffle and some errors. Top class, modern historians now regard that figure as grotesquely disproportionate.

It is one of the most successful internationsal businesses of all time. You have the temerity to post this kind of Nazi apologist garbage in a comments thread of an article by a writer whose gentile grandparents had been murdered in a concentration camp and whose gentile mother spent two years in a labor-extermination camp, was a state witness in the post-war trial of its commandant, and relayed her wartime experiences to this writer directly.

Moreover, a writer who was born and grew up one hour by car from Auschwitz and three kilometers from the plant where the firm Hoch und Tiefbau AG had built the crematoria for that camp.

In which, alone, 2. Moreover, you desecrate the memory of Witold Pilecki plus other Polish officer escapees from Auschwitz who produced written reports, e. I am omitting here reports by Jewish escapees, for example the Vrba-Wetzler report, as well as the fate of the Jewish part of my family during the war, so as to skirt the whole specious Joooos-tainted-it aspect of your comment.

The lowest for Auschwitz, for instance by the Polish historian Franciszek Piper , cites 1. The highest figure cited for Auschwitz is 4 million. However, much has happened since it went up, including the Blogger outage. Scroll down for a report on that. More new posts will be added below this one. The essay below is the conclusion of the ninth part in a series by Takuan Seiyo.

See the list at the bottom of this post for links to the previous installments. For over 60 years, White mea-culpists have had a firm grip in all fields of cultural mind imprinting: Their main endeavor has been to enforce their compulsory e.

K and discretionary e. Nor the evils of the worldwide Islamic Inquisition which — not in the 16th century but now, in the 21st, condemns Muslim apostates to barbaric execution. Instead, aggressive White androphobes of all genders which I can no longer count are decimating the philogynous and egalitarian West.

Equality psychos are tearing down the most egalitarian society that ever existed except for initial communist experiments, before they turned bloody. American Jews, at the apex of the greatest fortune and philosemitic tolerance their long diaspora has ever bestowed on their kind, are busy supporting all the ideologies and policies that demolish their safe harbor and build up their Muslim, Black and Third World enemies.

Leftoid masochists and the Christian meek call for returning Hawaii to the Hawaiians and capitulating before a massive Mexican reconquista of one-third of America. The rightful Etruscan landowners are not bearing angry placards in front of the Vatican. The Japanese are not planning to relinquish Hokkaido to its original owners, the Ainu.

The tall, white and fair-haired Chachapoyas of the Andean forest have, alas, no remnants left to sue the Incas for genocide in a Peruvian court of law. However, even that great moral abyss of Western civilization — the Holocausts — stands out more in its industrialized and organizational features than it does either in the quality of its hatefulness or its relative or even absolute volumes.

In relative numbers, in just one year, , the Hutus and Tutsis in Rwanda, killed off a total of one million, in a population of 7 million. Is it more humane to go by a stroke of a blunt machete than by a whiff of Zyklon B?

The Khmer Rouge murdered at least 2 million Cambodians between and Is it more humane to die by wallops from a Cambodian pickaxe handle than by a bullet from a German Mauser? Inscription on the back in German: There is a special horror attached to the Third Reich, because those were 20 th century Europeans, Christians, and in many ways the smartest, most civilized people on Earth.

But the Holocausts do not prove that Whites are worse than other people, just that they are no better. The history of the Third Reich also proves that with the right formula of economic blowup, misery and humiliation, sparked by charismatic evil, no people are immune to such horror, at no time.

Our Norwegian correspondent The Observer sends his translation of an article and interview with two respectable high-profile Muslim leaders in Oslo, who have strongly negative opinions about Jews and the worldwide Jewish conspiracy. A new trend seems to have developed in the Islamic community in Norway: It should also be pointed out that this is the same mosque that the Norwegian police apologized so profusely to last year for the fact that we have freedom of speech in Norway.

The translated article from Dagsavisen:. Many Norwegians have a negative view on Islam due to Jewish domination of the media. We are visiting Central Jamaat-e Ahl-e Sunnat, the mosque with the largest member base in Norway, to talk to its spiritual leader. The mosque was founded in and currently has more than 5, members. The Imam begins by explaining that all three heavenly religions, Judaism, Christianity and Islam, are sacred to them.

Many people are unaware of this fact, says Sarwar. Both of them believe that the school visits confirms their views that Norwegians in general have an inaccurate impression of Islam and Muslims. People are ignorant because they get their information from the media, and the media only write negatively about Islam. Only a handful of people were behind the movie about Mohammed in the U. So who was financing them, who was backing them? A big tip of the Bodissey pickelhaube to our commenter Jolie Rouge, who has provided us with a brand new acronym.

Note the aggressor is not named other than by geographical location e. North Africa, Afghanistan and surprisingly the inclusion of Turkey.

So many wonderful comedy gems have been needlessly wiped! Of course, to put it another way, a lot of dud material too, some of which, like Meet the Wife, have irritatingly survived the years. Port Manteaux churns out silly new words when you feed it an idea or two. Enter a word (or two) above and you'll get back a bunch of portmanteaux created by jamming together words that are conceptually related to your inputs.. For example, enter "giraffe" and you'll get back words like "gazellephant" and "gorilldebeest". We would like to show you a description here but the site won’t allow us.