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Dear Yeti, I think I may be in love with my boss. I have been working at my new job for 3 months now. I begun picking up on subtle romantic undertones from my boss who is in his forties and happily married. One day he asked me if I wanted to go for a ride on his motorcycle, so I went. After that day I got so turned on everytime I am around him.
Eventually it happened where we were together alone in our shop and we had the most amazing sex I've ever had in my life. After that he told me that what happened was a mistake and that he was really in love with his wife. I'm not the type of girl to get involved with a married man but I can't stop thinking about him. Plus everyone in our shop says that his wife is a lesbian.
I never wanted to be in a situation like this but here I am. I don't dare lead on that I'm into him as much as I am but it's starting to interfere with my work. What's really messing me up is that my boss is almost 20 years older than me. Should I start snooping into his personal life to see if I am missing something about his supposed marriage or should I just back off entirely.
Why are you using the gossip of coworkers to justify your infidelity with this guy? I think what you are really asking me is do I get out of this situation, and how? The fact that he has cut off your romantic relationship cold turkey is probably a sign that he does remain a shred of dignity, and wishes to regress into his quasi normal life again. Advise him that you wish to air out all your feelings with him and ask if he has anything to divulge.
Should you tell his wife? Yea probably, being open and honest is cathartic and help you add closure to this chapter in you life. However you should put out some feelers on this first. The truth is that other peoples relationships can be incomprehensible for outsiders and that infidelity and public infidelity can be two different things entirely.
Try dating unattached men your own age with whom you can relate to. Come out of the game and do focus on you , That is good stable piece of work if you could handle yourself being go for a man almost 20 years older could be a experiece that you need to spell your self. By the way making such decisions making your way more confusing , beter to be clear and go to men with you could comfortably relate.
Dear Betty, I know how you feel about falling in love with your boss. This is situation what you made up your own decision to leave alone from your boss but he is married man. I would like you to leave that married man. I hope that you can find someone else who willing to come to your life in the future.
You must be focus your control of your life and understanding what people said to you, You will have marry virgin male who not married man. Many handsome guys is different persons what you should choose or you like. Make sure if you could be think how will you feel about that. I wish you the best luck. This is an old story. I wonder how things turned out for you. Are you still employed and if so, in what way? Best of luck to you. Tough situation when love or even just feelings are involved.
But know that if you walk away now and work on yourself, you will see the situation for what it really is within a year at most, like we all do when feelings are not involved. Just learn from it and try not to repeat the same mistake. This did happen for a reason, I believe that.
Just quit you job and move on with your life. I hope his kids find out,too. Then I hope you both get what you so dearly deserve. S your bos just wanted to hit that. Though it must of not ben that good if he tells u im sorry after words. The only thing i can see that would scare a man away from an easy undergound affair would be. That your obviously too clingy and got too serious to fast which is your fult really. Just hope he dont see you as a threat and hope he dont decide to fire your ass.
Three months you say, i need to look into owning a business and a motercycle. I think your cute, too!!!!! If you love him, tell him!!!! This why divorse rages on because the promise of a man and a women to remain faithful means nothing anymore.
Life requires tough decisions and I guess same is happening with you. Love certainly is much more complex thing. May be you are facing a strong infatuation towards your boss so its better to find someone else with whom your can relate yourself. Keep yourself busy and gradually you may fill that empty space in your life. Im married and have two kids, I have been with my husband for 15 yrs. We are high school sweetheardts who had a baby to young but we made it.
Thats something you dont see often enough. Leave him alone and be a better person. He has has to live with hisself and so do you. Theres more people involved then just your feelings. As far as going into his personal life there is a word for that…. OH and by the way it was the bike vibrating between your legs that turned you on. I completely agree with the proposition that this individual should move on in terms of both her love life and her professional life.
At least he should be easy to get a good reference from it. That will happen of its own volition, believe me. Dear BB, Wow, interesting situation. First off, I think that anyone who can cheat on his wife can cheat on you. You knew he was married and he knew what he was doing. I think you should just move on from the situation. I always try to be honest and its worked so far. Not much people like my honesty but it has to be said.
Tell his wife, move on and get a different job. Tell him that he was a mistake and that he took advantage of you. Let this be a learning experience to you and never do it again. Hey u, in the first place u have no business dating married men what is it u dont understand! He has a family u moron he was never urs to begin with. All u were looking 4 was a check book but what u didnt know was that check book was taken n being balanced lol. I hope she finds out n gives u what u deserve lol.
What u dont want done to u dont do it to others. Cus if he did this to his wife his gonna do it to u lol,,,,,,, SABY. Well I think the same she is confused heck yeah I really hope this happens to her once she marrys and has kids of her own then she will know who it feels. Sad she should not tell his wife she should just leave that job and find another. How do u sleep with a man and say u r in love in less then 3 months. BS She just wants money.
Need I say that you remind me of my slutty ex wife? I know yer young and attractive, but your boss is married and you knew it. He is a complete Asss face and you decided to be his little whore. Chances are she had dinner ready for him when he came home after his roll in the hay with you. Stop making excuses for your selfish, slutty ways, and stop having sex with married men.
Now, Have a nice day. It is very common for young women to be attracted to their bosses. You both could have lost your jobs and and lives ruined forever!!! Not only your boss, but his wife and children could also be affected. Picture him without his job, growing old, loosing his hair, big, fat beer belly hanging over his jeans, sitting on the couch, burping and farting…asking you for beer money, while he treats you like dirt and takes every young babe he can for rides on his bike!
I hope you have learned something from this. Please let this go and find yourself someone you can enjoy life with. U knew what, u r so awesome looking women./p>
Neither of us is equipped with the ruthless temperament necessary for that kind of confrontation, and I do still care for her, not in a sensual, passionate way, but I don't want to see her hurt. Instead, we've encountered boredom. Or at least I have. I think she takes my occasional dark moods as a sign of stress, tiredness or overwork, rather than a symptom of boredom and disillusionment. The worst part of it is, I can't tell her. She's faithful, trusting and naive, and she loves me deeply.
Any sign of grevious domestic disharmony, and talk of failure in our relationship, any hint that I no longer love her, would destroy her. Cowardice keeps me silent. Add to this the X-factor: I love her with an intensity that I wouldn't have thought possible a few years ago, and I wouldn't do anything to harm her or damage her trust.
The thought of what would happen to her if her parents split up fills me with dread. The emotional upheaval for all of us, the weekend-only access, the thought of never being allowed to get as close to her as I am now. I can't think of anything more horrible. So I soldier on, for her sake, and for the sake of not wanting to hurt my wife. I tolerate the tedium of a stalled relationship. We have always been different - different interests, different personalities.
Opposites attract, but now we just kind of cancel each other out. I can see it, she can't. So I continue to fake it. When she needs my affection, I respond dutifully.
My mouth smiles, but my eyes don't. I feel trapped and I can't tell her. The boredom, I can deal with; but the deceit Jo will be Oops I think I gave it away. Congrats on the 17th Caleb. Make all your years special. Thank you for this beautiful post! It does my heart good to see people valuing marriage the way God intended for us to. The outward appearance is what initially attracts us to a person, but it is the heart that holds that attraction.
Ben and I have been married for 21 years, and we can honestly say that we are more in love today than ever. We believe it is because of our spiritual growth. God has done a work in us that has made us more attractive to one another.
Praise Him for that! Thanks for the great post! Congrats on the 21 years for you and Ben. Awesome post and lesson! Wonderful tribute to your other half, my friend.
Christina is beautiful on the outside because she has an inner beauty that shines for all to see and that is because for so many years now the Holy Spirit indwells her. I was first attracted to my Mark because of his brains, and as well, he had a special quality about him that puts him head and shoulders above all the thousands of men I have ever met. He fascinates me and I never stop learning from his abundance of knowledge.
We thank God every day that He has placed us with one another. Caleb thats great message Sir. It means upto now her beautifullness hasnt vanished in your eyes. What a beautiful wife you have—inside and outside. Love this post and it reminded me of how important it is for me to value my wife more and more. The same convictions and values is what attracted me to my wife.
Her love for God, other people, and similar interests attracted and allowed us to stay together for 7 plus year. Thank you for a great read! Congrats on 7 years already! And with kids it just speeds up even more! Lovely post with some wonderful things to take away and reflect on. Your wife is beautiful, though. She has a radiance about her beyond the remit of make-up and photoshop. I have been married for 30 years…recently we ran into troubled waters…my wife wants out…I am not giving up at all…one question …how do I rekindle that emotional attraction I once had without smothering her?
I never ever regret my marriage. Yeah but just look at your wife. Would you feel the same way if she had gained nearly lbs? We men are visual first, God designed us that way. Would it still be possible to have an attraction to her then? I think it would change in some ways how I look on her outward appearance and it may make it more difficult to look past it.
However, as a husband I must value above all else her inward beauty, I must value her heart. That is a great response. I really did enjoy this post. I was just wondering what would happen in a different situation. I am thinking about proposing and getting married soon and those thoughts enter my mind. You are a blessed man! Caleb, you are wise beyond your years. Many years ago when my wife and I were newlyweds, she asked me if I would still love her when she was old and fat.
Without any hesitation I said yes, I would still love you. Jane and I recently celebrated our 30th anniversary. And, like you, I find my wife more attractive now than ever before. There has to be more than physical attraction to make it work in the long run. You are absolutely right about that. Love that lasts is more than a youthful passion. It is a deep and abiding commitment. There is a beautiful poem written by Thomas Moore over two centuries ago about that kind of loving commitment:.
Believe me, if all those endearing young charms, Which I gaze on so fondly today, Were to change by tomorrow, and fleet in my arms, Live fairy-gifts fading away, Thou wouldst still be adored, as this moment thou art, Let thy loveliness fade as it will, And around the dear ruin each wish of my heart Would entwine itself verdantly still. It is not while beauty and youth are thine own, And thy cheeks unprofaned by a tear, That the fervor and faith of a soul may be known, To which time will but make thee more dear!
No, the heart that has truly loved never forgets, But as truly loves on to the close, As the sunflower turns on her god when he sets The same look which she turned when he rose!
"I Was a Starter Wife": Inside America's Messiest Divorce. In the middle of her headline-grabbing divorce settlement from Elon Musk, Justine Musk reveals the truth about her marriage to the. Stepmoms often wonder why their husband's ex-wife hates them. They don't think they've done anything wrong and many times they've never even met each other. Here is a list of the most common reasons stepmoms are treated poorly by their husband's ex-wife. Go to end of list. Go to chronology. Go to topics list. Go to Pride&Prej. motifs. Go to place list/map. Go to table of contents. Brief, Organized Listing of Characters.